The Diary of Katsuya
by Yunagirl07
Summary: Kaiba reads an entry in Katsuya's diary. Might continue. It really depends how many people review and let me know what they think.
1. Chapter 1

_Have you ever realized something that you shouldn't have? Something that made you wonder: what if or how come, why?__A thought that constantly comes back to haunt you, and you can't seem to sake it off?  
All you can do is watch that person be happy with another person, and there's absolutely nothing you can do to change that. But that's what you want; for that person to be happy. You'd do anything to see a smile on their face, even if you aren't the one making them smile.  
You would hurt anyone that causes them pain, because that's just the way it is.  
It's sad that you can't speak these…feelings; you have to pretend that nothing's going on inside you.  
Just being in their presence, you can forget all your worries, all your pain.  
Your feelings will continue to be left unspoken, and it will tear you apart one by one. Some things are better left unsaid.  
You understand why being with them brightens your day.  
You wouldn't try interfering with that force that keeps you away, because that force, it's your best friend.  
Being alone with these thoughts is so heartbreaking, so troublesome. You want to tell someone, anyone, but mostly that one person. But you understand that if these words are spoken, to anyone, the world will start trembling beneath your feet.  
You'll keep these words unsaid, keep these feelings inside, because…  
…loving them is so wrong…  
Loving __**you **__Seto Kaiba…it's just so wrong._

Kaiba placed down Jounouchi Katsuya's diary, trying to take everything he read in. A voice in his head that he completely ignored told him not to read the blonde teen's diary, but he couldn't help himself. Now he wished that he would have listened to that annoying voice.

"Hey Seto!" He heard his boy friend Yugi greet him as he entered into the attic. Jou used to live with Seto, but was back home with his dad. His dad used to have a drinking problem, but decided to get help.

Kaiba quickly hid Jou's diary behind his back, throwing it anywhere behind him so he could hug his boy friend.

**Okay, so I might just leave it here, or if you want me to continue, than just let me know.**


	2. Chapter 2

Its been a week since I read the mutt's diary. I thought he would have noticed it was missing by now, but he never showed up at the mansion.

I was pretending to be interested in a book, but in reality I was more interested in Yugi and his friends. The mutt was laughing and smiling, having a great time. You never would have noticed that he was missing something precious to him.

I don't really hang out with the dweebs. I'm dating Yugi, not his friends. So why hang out with any of them? Jou and I weren't exactly "friends" but we didn't bicker like we used to. Things changed after he lived with me for a while. We don't go out of our way to talk to each other, but when the time comes we make conversation.

I found myself thinking about what would happen if the mutt showed up at my mansion, wondering if he left his diary there. That would probably never happen. I don't understand why this has been bugging me so much.

"Kaiba." I snapped out of my thoughts and glanced up to see a smiling tri- haired colored boy. I stared at him with my usual expressionless face. Yugi bends down to give me a quick kiss. I glance over at the mutt from the corner of my eye to see him staring right at us. Is this what he usually does when Yugi and I are around each other?

* * *

"Need a ride?" I asked after the window was down. Yugi and Jounouchi looked over to me.

"That'd be great, but Jou and I are going to the arcade." Yugi stated. There really was no point in giving them a ride to the arcade. It was only a little down the street from school.

I looked over at the mutt; he was looking down at the ground, hands in pockets, very tense.

"Thanks anyways." Yugi closes the distance between us and gives me a kiss. I didn't take my eyes off the mutt. He looked up and stared at me, a painful expression clearly on his face. That's when I realized, I was losing all my feelings for the boy kissing me.

**~-Sorry that it's so short. I just think that leaving the ending like this is good enough, keeps you guessing, haha.-~****~Review and let me know what you think.~**


	3. Chapter 3

I woke up at 5am and slammed my fist down on the alarm clock. Today was Friday, finally. It's been a few days since that day I saw Katsuya's face in the parking lot. I think Yuugi felt that something was wrong. We wouldn't have our late night phone conversations and I barely paid any attention to him when he would come over to the Kaiba Corp while I worked.

I remember him asking many times if I was mad at him. I gave him the closest to a smile that I've ever given any besides Mokuba and told him that I was just busy lately. It wasn't really a lie or anything. I just wanted to grow some distance between us.

I thought that maybe if he and I grew apart his feelings for me would fade and neither of us would get hurt. Yuugi and I have come a long way and I don't know what he would do if he found out that I didn't want to be with him anymore.

I sigh when I remember that we had our traditional Friday dinners out. I would take him to an expensive restaurant and we would go back to my place for a while. We never did anything more than kissing, Yuugi wanted to wait. I really didn't want to do this, but I knew that if I cancelled plans he would know that something was definitely up.

I was on my way to school, in the back of the limo when I saw the mutt walking on the sidewalk. I told my driver to pull over toward him as I held in the button so the window would go down.

"Get in." He jumped a little when he heard my voice, but nodded and got in on the other side.

He was moving his fingers, just watching them like they were the only things that mattered at that moment. He looked cold, upset-my eyes widened as I thought that maybe his dad went back to drinking.

"Is your dad-is he-" He looked over at me for a moment and his eyes widened.

"Oh, no no no no no." He waved his hands. "Why would you even ask that?"

I shrugged. "Just wondering. You look a little out of it." I heard a little noise escape his lips as he turned his head.

"I think…maybe it's because I'm used to not hiding my emotions around you…" he trailed off. I waited for him to say something else. When I didn't think he was going to speak, I opened my mouth but quickly shut it as he said more. "Ever since I lived with you it's like…you and I matured in a way and I feel like…I don't have to hide anything from you."

I raised my eyebrows. Are the mutt and I having a deep conversation? That's when something clicked. He said he feels like he doesn't have to hide anything from me, but-

"Huh, you have absolutely nothing to hide?" I cross my arms and look over at him, staring intently. The mutt looks over at me confusingly, than bites his lip and lowers his eyes.

He sighs, but seems like he's at a loss for words. "Kaiba, it's…it's just that-"

The limo comes to a halt and we're in front of the school. Before I could say anything Katsuya was already out of the door.

He's going to keep hiding his secret. In his diary, he said that he would not speak of it. But how could I get him to admit it to me?

**I'm sorry this is so short…I really don't have any inspiration to write this, but I don't want to leave everyone in the dark either…review and let me know what you think. The next chapter might be longer, but it might take a while also.**


	4. Chapter 4

**First off I'd like to thank Sherabo for giving me an idea to write this chapter. I'm thinking of using some of the ideas that were in the message. So thanks =]**

**Okay, on with the chapter =D**

Yuugi knew something was up or he was just upset that I haven't been paying that much attention to him. Because of my pushing away, Yuugi has been getting very clingy. Instead of talking to his friends before class he came over to me to talk about our Friday night out. Instead of sitting at his usual table for lunch, he brought his friends over to me. There were so many times that I wanted to scream out and tell him to leave me alone, but I didn't want to lose my cool.

I wasn't sure what to do anymore. I wouldn't mind being friends with Yuugi, but I don't think he'd feel the same way. All I knew was that he's been suffocating me. I needed to breathe my own air. Instead of going to my last period I decided to head to the abandoned gym. It's not like I was going to get into trouble anyway. I am _the _Seto Kaiba.

As I placed my hand on the doorknob I heard a faint noise. I opened the door as quietly as possible. I moved inside and stood at the door, looking around for any sign of anyone else. I looked to my right and in the corner of the dark gym I saw a mess of blonde hair. I walked over to the mutt. He was…crying? He held his head down between his knees, his arms tightly around him.

I did the only thing that came to mind, knelt down and wound my arms tightly around him. I heard a gasp escape his lips, but didn't let go.

"Why ar-are you-" I didn't let him finish his sentence.

"I always hold Mokuba when he cries," I know that I didn't owe him any explanation, but explained to him anyways. "it seems to make things better."

Katsuya didn't say anything else. He let his pain out. I just couldn't believe how he could trust me enough to see him like this. Maybe he really was used to letting me see his emotions…

* * *

"Seto!" I take sigh with annoyance and turn around to face Yuugi. He gives me a big hug and wouldn't let go.

"Yuugi…" he knew how I felt about public affection sometimes.

"Oh, sorry. Anyways, why don't I just come home with you? We could play with Mokuba before going out to dinner." He gave me a cheerful smile, trying to get a yes out of me.

"Yuugi, I have a lot of work to do-"

"So you're bailing on our plans…?" He looked very upset.

"No, I have time to take you out to eat," Even though I don't want to. "But that's it. I'll have to take you home right after." Yuugi nodded, mumbled okay and walked away. I felt this sharp pain in my chest. I felt bad that I didn't feel for him the same way anymore. It was like a sin…but I, I'm beginning to see someone else in his place…

I started tearing things apart in the attic right when I got back to the mansion. I had to read that same entry in the mutt's diary I did before, just to know that I really read it.

After finally finding the diary I flipped through the pages, looking for that specific entry. After finding it I read it over and over again, and it stabbed me in the heart every time I read it.

When I finally looked at my watch I realized that it was almost five. I've been up here for almost an hour. I decided to go get my shower and get ready for my date with Yuugi. I placed the mutt's diary in my briefcase and headed toward the bathroom.

* * *

"Thanks for such an amazing night, Seto." Yuugi gave me a flirty grin. I grinned and took a bite of my Kaiseki-ryori.

It seemed like dinner lasted for hours and I was relieved when we finally pulled up in front of Yuugi's house. Yuugi leaned in and pressed his lips against mine. His kisses became more desperate. He took my hand and I felt him move it down his chest, his stomach, his legs-

"What are you doing?" I asked coldly, breaking all contact with him.

"I just thought that…maybe you and I could have a little-you know." He winked at me. He was so desperate for my attention that he was ready to give himself up to me? Even though he wasn't ready.

I took a deep breath and gave him a quick tender kiss. "I'll call you tomorrow." Yuugi furrowed his brows, got out and slammed the door behind him. He was pissed, but I didn't seem to care all that much.

* * *

"Take me to the trailer park down town." I told my limo driver after Yuugi was safely in his house.

I hated this part of town. I've only been here two times to check on the mutt. And here I was again. I couldn't believe I was doing this, but it had to be done. I knocked on the door and was greeted by Katsuya's dad.

"What are you doing here? I haven't done anything to my son!" I knew that I was a threat to Katsuya's father now. I can see it in his eyes that he was being truthful about not hurting him.

"Dad? Who's here-Kaiba?!" Katsuya screamed with astonishment.

"We need to talk," I stated. "Now." Katsuya looked at his dad who said he'd leave us alone and walked off.

Katsuya stepped outside and shut the door behind him, leaning against it. His eyes were red and puffy and I think he's been crying.

"Your dad seems to love you so much now." We smiled at each other. My heart seemed to pound a little harder as he smiled at me.

"Yeah, he's been good to me." His smile faded and he looked at me, something was on his mind. Well, of course.

"Kaiba…I-uhm…left something at your house…or at least I thought-" He stopped talking and his eyes widened as I held up his diary. I handed it to him.

"Thought you might like it back." I smirked. "Well goodnight." I stepped away from Katsuya and headed toward my limo until I felt a hand grab my arm. Usually I would be on my guard, but I knew it was Katsuya who grabbed me.

"Thanks, Kaiba, really. I appreciate it." He said after I turned around to face him. We stared into each other's eyes for a moment. I wanted to lean down and brush my lips against his, but there was a force that kept me away. It took me a few moments to realize that his fingers were intertwined with mine.

"I got to get going." My throat was dry and my heart was racing. He nodded and let my hand go. "You still have my number if you need me for anything?" His brows furrowed with confusion, but he nodded anyways. Neither of us wanted to move and it was so hard to walk away from him. With ever step I took away from him I found myself wanted to run back.

After getting into the limo I tried to remember exactly what I wrote in the mutt's diary on the last page. It was something like:

_It's never wrong loving someone when your feelings are returned._

**Honestly, I really like this chapter, but if things don't go the way I plan them to, than I might take it down and go with a new chapter. Because of Sherabo, there are so many things I want to do with this story. xD  
And I'm not sure if I'm even gonna have Jou see what Kaiba wrote until like...way later. I don't know. But review and let me know what you think =D**


End file.
